How to Be More Attractive to Every Guy You Meet

How to Be More Attractive to Every Guy You MeetDo you want to be more attractive?

Silly question, I know. That’s like asking if you want a million dollars. Or if you want frizz-free hair, no matter the weather.

Yes, yes, and HOLY COW, YES.

Well, you’re in luck. I can tell you how to instantly be more attractive right now.

Be selfless.

Research confirms that folks who are altruistic generally have more success in the dating arena. (Selfless people even have more sex, according to the study.)[i] Researchers concluded this is because selflessness makes you more attractive.

But there’s a problem. “Be selfless” is lame advice.

It’s lame because it sounds like something your kindergarten teacher would say when you reach past the kid in front of you for a juice box. Plus, it’s just way too vague to mean anything.

Seriously, what does it look like to “be selfless”? How do you pull that off?

I’m glad you asked. It just so happens that I have four suggestions.[ii] These are little things you can weave into your everyday routine with minimal effort.

Start practicing these selfless behaviors today to instantly become more attractive to every guy you meet.

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How to Get a Guy to Like You FAST

How to Get a Guy to Like You FASTHow do you make a lasting impression when you only get 60 seconds?

That’s all the time it takes for people to start judging you. It’s an insanely short window.

Take Jessica as an example. She’s single and interested in meeting someone new. So she goes out, mingles, and tries to stay socially plugged in.

Recently, she was at a happy hour with some friends. They got into a conversation with some guys at the next table. They talked for a bit, and then the men moved on.

When you’re single, opportunities to meet someone can pop up and vanish just that quickly. You get a few minutes of conversation at most. That’s it.

It doesn’t matter if you’re in a typical social environment, like a bar, or somewhere else, like the gym, the breakroom at work, or even the grocery store. If you meet a guy you’d like to get to know better, you get one shot at a first impression.

How do you make it count?

There are several psychological hacks[i] you can use to make the most of those moments. These aren’t tricks or traps. I would never suggest that you deceive a guy you’re interested in.

Instead, these are ways to fast-track showing him the kind of person you are. And at the same time, you’ll get to find out what kind of person he is.

If you want to make the most of an opportunity for romance, the following three hacks will help nail that first impression.

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Love like a Loser

“The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.”

~G.K. Chesterton

how to love your man betterIf you don’t know someone personally who experienced this, I’m sure you’ve heard tales of people who were given a medical prognosis suggesting they have only three months to live. Oddly enough, many of these tales include some element of surprising joy and appreciation of life.

None of us would wish such a prognosis on someone, yet many of us have learned a valuable lesson from the experiences described by those who have walked this path. They speak of joy that seems to emanate from a sudden increase in their appreciation of the simple things in life that we typically ignore because of our constant pursuit of what’s coming next.

Humans are driven by the pursuit of pleasure and the avoidance of pain. All of our motivation comes from those polarized drives. We want more pleasure, and we want to escape from pain.

Our efforts to get more pleasure and avoid pain drive our minds to dwell in the future. Oddly enough, the experiences of those with a short time to live suggest we are looking in the wrong place. Rather than looking to the future, their experiences suggest we can find the greatest joy by bringing our attention fully to what we have .

It is not easy to turn off the longing for other circumstances, or some moment in the future when we will finally be relieved of some gnawing emotional or physical pain. Being told you have only a short time to live makes it easier though. Near-death experiences also make it easier.

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Turns Out Mr. Right Has A Quirk

dealing with men's quirksMr. Right is hard to find. He’s not Mr. Right because he is perfect. He is Mr. Right because he is right for you. Even if he is right for you, chances are he’s going to have a few quirks that annoy you.

They seem trivial, but annoying quirks can gradually drive a wedge between two people, especially when only one person realizes it’s even a problem. Here is a simple plan for disarming the negative emotional impact of his unusual quirks, along with a warning about the meaning of certain kinds of quirks.

Which is easier, finding a new Mr. Right with no quirks, or learning how to adapt to his unusual quirks? Of course, there is a third option, which is to gently train him to change the annoying behavior.

But let’s start with the assumption that the relationship has not yet reached a point where correction and feedback of his behavior would flow smoothly. Let’s start with a potentially painless fix you can use on yourself so that you don’t find his quirks so annoying.

Very often, the annoying features of someone else’s habits annoy us precisely because we have an opposite tendency or trait. For example, some people are annoyed when a housemate does not wash the toothpaste-spit down the drain after brushing their teeth. That same person probably feels annoyed with a partner who leaves their socks on the floor in the living room instead of walking them to a laundry hamper.

If you are the person that leaves your socks laying around, you probably have less of the personality trait psychologists call “conscientiousness.” It’s not that you don’t like the look of a neat and tidy home or sink; it’s that you don’t care nearly as much as someone who is very high on the conscientious trait.

Here is a simple way you can decrease your annoyance with Mr. Right when he obliviously annoys you with some habit or behavior.

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