How to Create That Special Resonance with Complete Strangers

how to resonate with peopleWhere do you get your energy from?

What makes you feel alive?

Do you agree that energy is important? Do you agree that people who routinely find ways to tap into energy reserves seem more vibrant and alive?

If so, you may also agree that romance can only be born when two people are energized when they meet.

In a long-term relationship, the quality of energy you bring to the relationship will determine the quality of the long-term benefit each partner receives.

What kind of person energizes you?

If you pursue romantic interactions with those who bring out your best qualities, guess what will happen. That’s right, you will find yourself in the company of people who bring out the best in you, and as a result you will tap into your higher qualities (your best identity) more often.

How To Resonate With People by Feeling A Special Connection

Sometimes it’s hard to figure out what it is about a person that makes you feel alive. With some people, you just feel a special kind of connection, and I believe it is the connection itself that ignites the energy you feel.

We resonate with some people more deeply than we resonate with others. I use this term, “resonate” to mean that feeling of being in sync, like the world suddenly becomes a less lonely place the second you enter their presence.

Sometimes you can feel it almost instantly. A friend of mine told me of an experience involving a woman he met on an elevator. He stepped onto the elevator, felt a warm connection with a woman he had never met before, and exited the elevator sixty seconds later knowing he could really enjoy spending time with her.

The two of them talked briefly on the elevator, and he could tell she was attracted to him. The feeling was mutual. They both lingered for a few seconds after exiting the elevator, both standing and looking into each other’s eyes, hesitant to let go of this sudden feeling of connection.

At other times, that sensation of feeling connected grows more slowly over time.

It’s a sense of oneness that allows you to experience the world together as it unfolds one second at a time. We often discover this sensation of oneness in moments of silence or a while working on a project together.

On a first date, it’s the space between your attempts at communication when your mind slips into that special kind of oneness with the man sitting across from you. These are the experiences you never forget, even if the circumstances of your life cause you both to go separate ways.

What Triggers These Special Moments?

It’s just my opinion, but I ask you to consider it; test it and determine if it holds any truth. I believe the special resonance generates energy because some people help us to effortlessly slip into a fuller awareness of the present moment as it unfolds.

All the vibrancy of life is contained within the present moment. The future and the past are vivid in our imagination, but they hold none of the actual energy of the life force that pulses through each of us as time unfolds.

We often discover a special connection when we are not looking for it. The more forcefully our mind fuses with an agenda, a goal, or a desired outcome, the harder it is to fully embrace the present moment for what it is here and now.

When you find yourself interacting with a potential partner because of a goal to build some kind of relationship with them in the future, the most vibrant version of your mind and identity is somewhat deadened by the fact that you are partially living in the future, less identified with the present moment as it unfolds.

In contrast, when you find yourself unexpectedly resonating with another human being, you simply marvel at the unfolding experience in “the now.” So it is no surprise that we often find these special connections with people when we are not looking for them.

While these special connections seem to happen rather serendipitously, I believe we can encourage them by taking one simple action. Practice connecting with people in the present moment frequently. Do this when you first meet someone. Do it before you evaluate what the relationship could become in the future.

For example, do not look to see if he has a wedding band on his finger. Do not check what kind of shoes he is wearing. You can do all of that a few seconds later. Instead, each time you meet a new person, or even someone you have known for years, start by trying to experience the present moment in his presence.

Hhow to resonate with peopleave you ever had one of these special connection moments? I am curious whether any of you have noticed anything unusual that is either predictive or somehow related to these experiences. Share your comments below so we can all look for common themes together.

By the way, I have spent a great deal of time exploring the hidden passages that seem to emerge at points of sudden deep connections between men and women. My private clients and I have shared that journey together, and I have distilled many of our secrets into an advanced relationship course.

It is a coaching and self-study course available to any of you who recognize the true value of leveraged knowledge. I encourage you to speed your dating success by learning from those who have been studying this concept for a while. Click here to learn more now.

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41 thoughts on “How to Create That Special Resonance with Complete Strangers

  1. Sandra said:

    About 2 years after a divorce, a friend invited me to a professional singles club just forming. I was busy with my work and not too interested but she kept asking so i went to a buffet dinner at a local restaurant in a private party room. Round tables of 6 were convenient for conversations. Across from me was a guy with beautiful blue eyes who caught my attention. The two of us did most of the talking and when asked why I was still single, my response was “I haven’t found a guy who could keep up with me”. He asked where I worked and the next day I got a phone call at work asking me to go out for lunch. That was the beginning of an exciting life and we are still married after 30 years.

  2. Angie said:

    My husband and I have been happily married for 30 years. He often asks me to look him in the eyes when we are making love. When we do, it’s as though time stands still – and this stillness allows the deepest of all connections to happen. It’s as though you’re communicating at the soul level. Living in and being fully aware of the present moment is extraordinary and elevating; I believe 2 people can actually feel it when it happens. It’s profound and memorable. Truly experiencing the present moment, with as many of the senses as possible (sight, sound, touch, taste, etc.), is where I believe the magic lives. I think whoever said, “The eyes are the windows to the soul” must have experienced deep connections frequently. Thank you for your amazing insight and shares, James. You make a beautiful difference in the world.

  3. Pam said:

    Four months after my husband passed away I was having coffee with a girlfriend when her neighbor and his brother who was visiting walked past and stopped to chat. When I was introduced to the brother and our eyes met there was an instant connection and neither of us could look away. It really rattled me. When we left he was waiting up the road and asked if he could talk to me. Long story short we had a wonderful “friendship” and spent 12 months as companions, unfortunately he was “emotionally unavailable” and as I needed more from him then he could give me we decided to part. But he was definitely the right man for me at the time. Would love to find that special connection that leads to a future fulfilling relationship.

  4. Laura said:

    Two years ago I was married (for several years) and very unhappy. One day my husband called a handy man to come give us a quote for some work to be done. When this man walked in I felt I found something I had lost a long time ago. I could barely breathe. The connection I felt was something one feels only in a dream. Or watching one of those love films that makes you think this type of love is not real. As soon as the gentleman left later that afternoon I asked my husband for a separation. I didn’t know anything about this gentleman for all I knew he could have been married or flat out not interested in me. Needless to say two years later I am still with him and have never been more connected to another individual in all my life. Time stands still when we are together. I have an unconditional love for him. True Love does exist after all!!!!

  5. Laura said:

    Saturdays my Mom and I play tennis then have dinner at our club. Last weekend we were deep in conversation when several men passed by our table but one looked right into my eyes and said, “Hi.” I was caught off guard but gave him a quick “Hi” back. It was so strange but thrilling at the same time. There was a brief (very brief) but very real connection, resonance if you will. My Mom noticed it and teased me afterward with a “Hi” and a wink. I think I actually blushed! I’ve thought of that several times this week and wondered if I might see him again this weekend, same time, same place?

    • James Bauer said:

      Great example, Laura. I hope you see him again!

      • Tracey said:

        That’s very sweet Laura.

      • Laura said:

        Thank you Tracey and James. I hope so too but, if I don’t, it’s fun to know what to watch for in the future!

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