The world has blown up. There are only two people left on Earth:
You … and Mr. Dreamy.
There’s no one else left. No rivals. No one thinner, prettier, or sexier. No one who’ll steal him from you.
Do you fall in love and live happily ever after?
It’s tempting to think that’s what it would take.
To get the attention of a Mr. Dreamy, you’d have to rid the world of other women. Other women are the problem. They’re the reason men look the other way.
Sounds a bit extreme!
But have you ever had thoughts like:
If only she wasn’t here, he’d pay attention to me.
She stole him from me, even though she knew I was interested in him.
I can’t compete with her. I’m no swimsuit model.
Jealousy makes a lot of sense when you operate from a “scarcity” mindset.
Scarcity is the idea that the dating pool is limited and there aren’t enough guys to go around. You have to fight to get in front, and then you have to fight to keep your man.
You’ll find a lot of support for that belief. It’s a popular one.
But if you stretch that belief to its logical conclusion—that the best way to snag a man is to get rid of the competition—you realize there’s a problem with scarcity thinking.
If the world blew up tomorrow, leaving only you and your ideal man, would you be happy?
Maybe you would. Maybe love is all you need. Maybe you don’t need other people.
But maybe Mr. Dreamy isn’t all he’s cracked up to be. You’d be left until the end of time with no one but a man for company. Might get boring. You might end up wishing for another woman to talk to.
To be happy, we need more than love. We need our social network around us.
Without friends, who would we vent about our other half to? You can love someone to the moon and back, but still need your friends for heart-to-hearts.
As long as there are other women in the world, there’s a chance your dream man might shift his attention away from you. And that’s a chance worth taking.
Instead of eliminating the competition, a better strategy is to look at what you do when you start feeling jealous.