Here’s A Quick Way to Energize Conversations with Your Man

how to have better conversations with your man

Any positive memory can give you an instant energy boost. Let me show you how.

Several years ago, I read a study about vacations. The researchers were trying to determine how to make the relaxing feeling of being on vacation last as long as possible.

Believe it or not, they found souvenirs to be very helpful. No, a coffee mug can’t capture all the wonderful things that make a trip energizing. But it can remind you of a time of stress-free fun.

Memories are powerful. And I’m not just talking about vacation memories, either. In fact, you can harness the power of any positive memory in about five minutes.

Sit down with a pen and a piece of paper. For just five minutes, write about a time you felt inspired, energized, or deeply interested in something.

The subject matter could be anything. Perhaps a Broadway musical that tapped into your passions. Or maybe something awe-inspiring you saw, like a meteor shower, a waterfall, or a double rainbow. It could even be a moment when you received good news about something.

As you write, focus on the way you felt. Not just on what happened. Write what you were thinking during the experience. Your goal here is to recapture the sensations of the moment. As you do that, you’ll begin to feel yourself shift toward a more inspired and energized state of mind.

This simple mind-hack is effective because of how memory works. To access a memory, your brain has to activate your senses. It has to literally recreate the same feelings and sensations you experienced during the original event. The act of intentionally focusing on a time you were inspired will make you feel inspired all over again.

Now, I want you to do three things. First, I want you to try it.

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Best First Date Conversation Topics

first date conversation

My friend accidentally sent a sip of Coke up her nasal passage. She was laughing too hard at Jeremy’s story.

I bet you’ve had some lively conversations like this.

Think about the most fun you ever had with a group of friends. Chances are, you and your friends stumbled into some lively conversation topics. Maybe something that got you all laughing.

Or maybe it was happy news a friend shared. Whatever the case, your conversation topics were a part of what made the interaction a bonding experience.

Today I want to tell you about a weird psychological research study.

Psychologists were trying to study the power of subconscious mental associations. It’s a well known fact that our mind notices things outside our conscious awareness.

But the question was, “Can this be used on purpose to influence people?”

Psychologists gave research subjects lists of words that seemed random. But all the words had a very subtle connection.

For example, one was, “foam, horse, and shell.” (Can you guess what these words have in common?)

Most people don’t consciously notice an association. But sophisticated research methods have revealed that your mind becomes primed to think of the sea when exposed to these three words as a group.

(The connection is sea foam, seahorse, and seashell…all containing the word “sea”).

Anyway, the psychologists used this “priming effect” to get research subjects to unconsciously think about old people (using a different set of words but same idea). Afterward, they secretly timed how long it took the participants to walk down a hallway to another room.

Those who were exposed to “old people” words unconsciously adopted a slower pace of movement. Those exposed to other mental associations walked faster.

Now, I’m setting a bad example. Never launch into a story about a research study on a date (unless you are both Ph.D. students with a common interest or something).

The reason I bring up this research study is because I want you to recognize something important. Your date will unconsciously associate YOU with whatever topics you discuss on a date with him.

first date conversationHis experience of you is very limited at first. First impressions are formed quickly, based primarily on how he feels in your presence. But the effect is still there even after years of spending time together.

So here’s my advice. Tap into peak life experiences.

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