Don’t Let Social Media Wreck Your Relationship

social media ruining relationshipsSome couples look so good on Facebook.

You know they’re happy.

They post sweet little comments on each other’s pages. They’re snuggled tight in their profile pics. Each time they go off to the beach or the mountains, a photo slideshow pops up the next day.

It’s enough to drive anyone jealous.

The worst thing is, researchers confirm that couples who look good on Facebook are probably happy in real life, too.[1]

Couples who go official on Facebook are more likely to be satisfied in their relationship than couples who prefer to keep their relationship status private. It’s true: when you’re in love, you want the whole world to know.

Researchers can even predict the strength of a relationship from examining Facebook profiles. They look for clues like couple photos, affectionate comments, and a coupled-up relationship status.

But there’s one little problem…

Facebook can expose the cracks in a relationship, too.

Couples counselors and divorce lawyers are well acquainted with the havoc Facebook makes of relationships.

It often starts when an ex or a former flame makes a friend request. You don’t think anything of it. After all, it was so long ago, and you’re keen to find out what they’re doing now. But your significant other notices. Jealousy creeps in. Arguments ensue.

Before social media arrived on the scene, it wasn’t always easy to avoid an ex, but it certainly wasn’t impossible. Once you got into a new relationship, you knew to delete your ex’s contact details and throw out all old memorabilia—or at least hide it in a box in the back of the closet. You didn’t shove your past in your new boyfriend’s face.

But if happy couples post photos of each other on Facebook, what happens when they decide to go their separate ways?

The photographic evidence remains … unto eternity.

Once relationships have gone public on social media, they’re incredibly difficult to erase.

You could delete all your pictures of each other and ask him to do the same, but what if a friend took pictures of the two of you and tagged both your names? What about all those lovey-dovey posts dating back years?

Luckily, Facebook now offers the ability to untag yourself.  But exes emerging from a long-term relationship still face a mountain of work to clear themselves from association with one another.

It’s a no-win situation:

Couples who go public on social media reap the rewards of greater relationship satisfaction. But if they ever split, they face being reminded of the past at every turn, which could dampen the fun of any new relationship.

It’s up to you to close the doors on the past. Don’t give past relationships a second life by leaving their ghosts online.

Here are three tips specific to Facebook.

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Facebook Encourages Cheating?

does facebook lead to cheatingApparently, Twitter and Facebook use can be hazardous to the health of your relationship.

It wasn’t that long ago that a study published in Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking announced Facebook increases the risk of cheating. According to the article, the temptation lies in reconnecting with an ex, which is ridiculously easy to do on Facebook.

Now we’re being told that online Twitter spats often spill over to the real world, leaving romantic partners at each others’ throats offline. This, courtesy of a study done by the University of Missouri.

Now, before you decide the folks at U of M are getting a little tech-paranoid, think about the logic behind these findings. Facebook and Twitter are all about connecting people, right? You’ve undoubtedly caught up with someone you haven’t seen in years via one of these social networks. They keep us all plugged in.

But, there’s a downside, too. People tend to be meaner online.does facebook lead to cheating

I’m hardly the first person to make this observation. The prevailing opinion is that the distance we feel sitting safely behind our keyboards allows us to be more candid and less tactful than we would be face-to-face.

If you tear into someone online and then see them a few hours later, things are going to be…awkward. Given the strong possibility that you came across more aggressively online than you would have in person, it’s easy to see how this dynamic can lead to some problems.

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