3 Ways to Invite Love to Chase You

3 Ways to Invite Love to Chase YouThere are two kinds of singles:

Those who wait for Prince Charming to land in their laps…

And those who jump on a white stallion and gallop off to find him.

Because you’re reading this right now, you might very well fit into that second category!

We’re raised to believe that you can’t get what you want until you go after it. You should set a goal and take concrete action steps in the direction of your dreams.

But love is a funny thing. You can’t “achieve love” in the same way as you can achieve other goals.

Love is slippery. We think we’ll find it one place, then it’s not there. It often pops up in the most unlikely of places at the most inconvenient times.

No wonder love is so frustrating. We’re used to being in control of every aspect of our lives. It feels like we should be able to make love happen by sheer willpower. But love continues to elude us, like a wild animal that doesn’t want to be trapped.

Perhaps a better approach is not to treat love like a goal to be achieved…

But rather as a mystery to respect and appreciate.

Accept that love is a much bigger force than you could ever understand or hope to control, and you may just find it appears when you least expect it.

The 21st century is not an age of mysteries. We believe in the power of science to explain most things. We trust in reason and causality.

But romance often seems unpredictable, as evidenced by stories like these:

Once upon a time, a woman went to a conference and saw a man staring at her across a room. He wouldn’t have even been there had his friends not dragged him out. They met, talked until dawn, and fell in love. Today they’re happily married with two children.

Once upon a time, a woman joined a friend at a baseball game. Baseball wasn’t even her thing. She didn’t know why she’d agreed to go that night, but she’s so glad she did. She met her future husband at the game. They’ve been married 12 years and counting.

So many love stories involve unlikely events such as these.

Wild, crazy synchronicities. Meeting each other against all odds.

That’s the essence of romance. Love stories captivate us most when they’re unexpected.

So why shouldn’t love come to you in the same way?

Why shouldn’t love land in your lap when you least expect it?

Maybe love isn’t something you have to hunt down. Maybe there’s a mysterious force—call it Cupid or St. Valentine or even destiny if you like—working on your behalf, summonsing the perfect conditions for you to meet the one who’s also been waiting for you.

Like this idea? Want to know more?

Then try these 3 tips for letting love take the driver’s seat.

  1. Accept that love’s timeline may be different from yours.

When you want something, you want it NOW.

Not next month. Certainly not next year.

But that sense of urgency scares love off.

It’s not great for you, either. You feel anxious when you think you’re not going to achieve your goal by the timeline you’ve set for yourself.

The alternative to urgency is having a bit of faith.

Believe that it will happen, and trust that the timing will be more perfect than anything you could have devised yourself.

  1. Release control and trust in the unseen forces at work.

Throughout history, humans have always believed that lovers get a helping hand from destiny. If two people are fated to fall in love, then events will conspire on their behalf to push them together.

That idea can sound silly these days.

When you’re single, you can feel very much as if you’re on your own. No one else is going to help you meet Mr. Right. Maybe you don’t even believe in one Mr. Right, but many Mr. Good Enoughs.

But without a belief in mysterious forces at work, you may not have the faith to listen to your gut or say yes to something just because a quiet voice deep inside urges you to.

  1. Stop resisting.

The more time you spend fighting the things you don’t like about your life—such as the lack of suitable men, or the difficulty of online dating, or the injustice of still being single—the more love stays away.

Love sneaks up to surprise those who are willing to see what is possible, not what is impossible.

So allow for the unexpected. Don’t let your preconceived notions keep you in a box. Love is much bigger than any of us can understand. Give it space to work its magic.

And let me know in the comments about a time when love surprised you.

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9 thoughts on “3 Ways to Invite Love to Chase You

  1. Stephanie said:

    I have a teenage son that lives with a persistent mental illness. I thought no man would ever want to date someone with kids like mine. We started going to the flea market to sell their old clothes & he fell in love with flea marketing. It was the only thing that made him smile back then. Every Saturday morning, he would wake me up at 2 Am to go to the flea market. Little did I know that sitting in a gravel parking lot on a cold January morning would lead to the love of my life. Even though I was in sweats with my hair in a ponytail & no makeup on, he asked me for my number anyway. That was 5 years ago. We aren’t married but are very much in love. We even hold hands at night watching tv in bed. And thanks to articles like these, I have been able to learn how to sustain a healthy relationship after a long term abusive one. Thank you for all that you do.

    • James Bauer said:

      That’s a neat story, Stephanie. Several people on my staff commented on what a sweet story you shared in this comment. It’s rather romantic because of the simple beauty we find within it. Sometimes that’s the best kind of story.

      • Stephanie said:

        Thank you. I wanted to tell it to give other women hope that love can be found in the most unusual & unexpected places. I wish all women could have a sweet story & love like I have at some point in there lifetime, even if it is only for a moment in time.

  2. Carol said:

    I was very happily married for 30 years and my husband passed away. A year later, friends dragged me to a dance. I didn’t want to go and I certainly didn’t want to dance with any men. I just didn’t think I was ready.
    I was on the dance floor, dancing a fast dance with a girlfriend, when I looked up and HE was staring at me. Our eyes held for about 15 seconds. A couple of songs later, he came over and we started talking. Five hours of talking later, he went home. We never stopped talking and now we’ve been together and happily in love for the last seven years…and I never dreamed I would ever find anyone I loved as much as my husband. I was wrong – I found love twice!!

  3. maribel linares said:

    El amor viene de adentro es cuando se conecta corazon y mente y hay que prepararse para poder recibirlo.
    Te estoy leyendo siempre en tu blog y eso me esta ayudando ha saber la manera de como llega el amor.
    He conocido una persona por el internet y siento que es una buena persona. Pero me dijo que cuando nos vieramos en la primera cita que me pusiera linda para amarnos apasionadamente porque ya no teniamos edad para estar perdiendo tiempo y que teniamos que vivir la vida y eso ha hecho ruido en mi cabeza

    Love comes from within is when you connect heart and mind and you have to prepare to receive it.
    I am always reading you on your blog and that is helping me to know the way love arrives.
    I have met a person on the internet and I feel that he is a good person. But he told me that when we saw each other on the first date that it would make me beautiful to love ourselves passionately because we were no longer young enough to be wasting time and that we had to live life and that made a noise in my head

  4. Tammy said:

    So far I have been pleased with what I have read. I am just starting a new relationship and I am praying it is a good one! I have been married and divorced twice! I know they say the third time is a charm! I am a bit scared and a bit untrusting for I have had my heart broken too much!! I am trying very hard on my part to be the best I can be…as a women, a partner in this life physically, mentally, spiritually! I want my man to be the same…prayers all please 😁💜😉

    • James Bauer said:

      Thanks for sharing a bit of your journey with us, Tammy. I’m glad to see the way you are honest with yourself about your fears, while also strong enough to step past them toward the things you want and deserve in a lasting relationship.

  5. Anya Setterfield said:

    Really good grounding advice

  6. Robert sweet said:

    After being out of high school for almost 30 years. Someone who I had a crush on, contacted me and disclosed his crush on me. I never knew he felt that way towards me. I was pleasantly surprised.

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