A Few Espionage Tips

Espionage Tips for womenGenerally speaking, a relationship only works if both partners make the decision to trust each other.  I have counseled quite a few women on the importance of either embracing a man and choosing to trust him, or getting out of the relationship if he is an untrustworthy person.  A relationship that involves constant anxiety about whether he is cheating is not a relationship worth being in.

The tips I have for you today are for those early stages of a new relationship where it can be helpful to get some very basic information on a guy you only recently met.  This is particularly important if you did not meet him through a mutual acquaintance. 

See Where He Lives Without Going There

In the age of cell phones, this trick is becoming less useful, but for some men it will still work.  Once you have his phone number, do the following to see where he lives:

1.       Go to 411.com and click on “reverse phone ”

2.       Type in his phone number and hit “search”

3.       That will give you his address.  Copy it down.

4.       Go to google.com/maps and enter his address

5.        When google shows you a map of his address, click the toggle button in the upper right hand corner of the map to switch to “satellite” mode.

6.       Now zoom in a little so you can see the address better.  You zoom in with the plus sign at the upper left side of the map.

7.       Now click the little orange man on the upper left of the map (he’s right in the middle of the zoom in and zoom out function).  Drag the little orange man to a spot on the road or driveway in front of the location you want to see.  When you drop him somewhere you will suddenly see the view of that spot as if you were standing there.  This is called street view, and it may not be available in all areas.

With street view you can move the camera side to side, forward, and even zoom in to see what kind of cars are parked in his neighborhood.  It’s not a live picture.  It was taken by google a while back, so you can’t spy on him or anything like that.  It’s just a way to get a sense for what kind of neighborhood he lives in.  Try it on your own home or a nearby shopping center.  It’s kind of spooky how much you can zoom in to see details.

Want to know a little more about his job or his salary range?  A tiny bit of research could give you some insights.  With a few internet search tricks you may be able to learn quite a bit.

Let’s say he tells you he works for a Community Hospital in Somewhereville, Illinois.  He doesn’t mention whether he’s a janitor or a surgeon, and you didn’t get the chance to ask yet.  If it matters to you, here’s what you can do:

Find Out What He Does at Work:

1.  Go to Google.com and put his name in quotes, like this: “John Doe.”  Put a plus sign in front of the quotes.  What that does is tell google you only want to see sites that include that exact name.  Then type a space and another plus sign followed by the name of the organization he works for or just the name of the city where he works if you don’t know the organization name.

It should look like this:    +”John Doe” + “Community Hospital”

Notice that there is not a space between the plus sign and the phrase you want to see in the search results.

What you’ll get is a webpage from his company that will often give you interesting information.  If nothing else, it is likely you will find a page with contact information and a job title.  If you’re lucky, you might find a page that describes his job duties or even a bio page.

Once you have a job description, you may not understand what it means.  Occupational titles have become increasingly hard to decipher over the years.  If it says, “IT Systems Engineer” you can figure out what that means by going to a website like the U.S government’s Occupational Outlook Handbook at  http://www.bls.gov/ooh/  where you can type in the job in the search box and get a detailed description of what he does, what the salary range is for his occupation, and a bunch of other stuff.

I hope you enjoy the research, but don’t let numbers and job descriptions outweigh what your heart tells you about a guy.

James


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23 thoughts on “A Few Espionage Tips

  1. Khana said:

    Does this work in Europe only? I have tried to no avail. Please advise.

    • James Bauer said:

      Hi Khana. I live in the U.S.A. I don’t know where you live, but it might not work in some places.

  2. mandy said:

    this may work if you are trying to find out whether he is a serial killer – but what ever happened to just getting to know a guy through just talking. And then there`s the trust issue – to me this whole thing is saying you don`t trust him before the relationship has even begun. mandy

    • James Bauer said:

      Yeah, you have a point, Mandy. These ideas are just ways of satisfying curiosity.

      • Paula said:

        Believe me – these steps ARE necessary if you meet through on-line dating sites! So many men lie it’s disgusting!

      • Emkay said:

        And women too!!

  3. colleta nafula said:

    wow.. so amazing! thank you Bauer for that information. i love it and am going to do just as you said.

  4. maria said:

    Thanks that’s a big help for everyone to be careful in the future specially knowing in dating site. More power.

  5. BJ said:

    I don’t go quite this far but I date off of Match and as soon as the conversation progresses to the point where I know his real name I Google him to make sure he has a job and no record!

    • James Bauer said:

      I’m not sure, Del. I’ll have to check with our technical genius to find out, but if you just entered that from your mobile, I would say the answer is no…you can access the web and our blog from any web-enabled smart phone anywhere it has an internet connection.

  6. MGG said:

    Thank you James, you actually saved me from a scammer. The red flag for me was that he fell heavily in love with me too quickly. What a shame ’cause he was actually very sweet. Of course, I know it was an act and he knew the exact things to say. Sigh. This crap is getting old..

  7. Vicky said:

    I’m just wondering how such approach of default mistrust (spying on someone) can help build a trusting relationship. At least I would be very wary of someone tracking me up like this. When I feel comfortable with someone I would give him this information (even invite him to my place) willingly. Maybe because I value people for their personal qualities, not their material possessions, and would like to meet someone alike. Potential stalkers hold no attraction for me, sorry.

    • James Bauer said:

      Yeah, sometimes you can tell a person is trustworthy and you don’t need to check facts.

  8. Kul said:

    I entered the number but it shows only the name of the city. I’m in India and it’s a vast city. I mean he’s trustworthy and loves me a lot and I just entered the number as an experiment. And found the above info

  9. Muriel said:

    I also check LinkedIn, Facebook, and the sex offenders registry.

  10. Susan said:

    VERY wise thing to do. Because of the type of business I’m in, I have an account at Instant Checkmate.com. It costs about $10 a month using the 6 month plan, but if you have the person’s first & last name, also gives peoples’ relatives’ and partners’ name/address/phone, everyone’s real age and astrological sign (if you’re interested), marriage & divorce records, some criminal background information, and has a $20 feature for a more in-depth,inclusive report on a person and an @$2/mo. extra charge for looking up by phone numbers feature. I just use the $10/mo. version., looking up by names. I don’t have any connection to the site other than signing up to use it. It isn’t 100% perfect. I use it constantly, and have found (very rarely) the following imperfections: 2 ages for one person I know, and for someone else I know, listing as a relative someone who isn’t related. Also, regularly, the marriage/divorce listings aren’t always complete and may not be dated as to when they actually happened. Also, sometimes you can’t tell for sure which address is the current one. But there’s a lot of info there and it’s ENORMOUSLY better than nothing. It’s been extremely helpful to me. With dating, if you don’t have a mutual acquaintance, it can confirm that a person is being truthful or alert you that they are not. Some men are just cons, period, who are after sex, your money, and tons and tons of your time and attention, and can take tons of additional time to recover from. They can be expert at spinning the truth to make themselves look good, and depending on how much they’ve honed their game, it can be incredibly hard to tell for sure before you really get sucked in. They come in a variety of styles. Doing some fact-checking (not stalking) can be a step in weeding ’em out. I’m very busy and getting older every day–don’t have 5 minutes to waste on their type.

    If anyone knows of a more accurate site that gives affordable background reports, please advise…Thanks!

    • James Bauer said:

      Thanks for sharing your valuable experience with this, Susan.

      James

      • Susan said:

        James, I meant to add that I can’t thank you enough for your wonderful posts. You’re in a class by yourself.

  11. Colleen said:

    I don’t close myself off to opportunities, however, I am particular as to how I meet someone. I must admit I was extremely lucky with men I met through online dating sites. Many of them after meeting have become friends and we stay in regular contact.
    But the last couple of men in my life have been introduced as friends of friends. I work with people daily through my job plus coaching and counselling, you do get a sense of who are bs’ing and who are sincere. Learn how to draw answers of them without them feeling like it’s an interrogation. 🙂
    Another little trick – FB them, you may be surprised at mutual friends in common.

  12. Sandi said:

    I use pipl.com a lot sometimes I use dirt search or peekyou or sociall search app good ways to see if he is in another relationship already .of course I check google + and Facebook too

  13. Nina said:

    Great information! Thank you so much. I was able to see a satellite & road view of his house, which confirms what he has been telling me, plus find out how old he is without asking. As I suspected, he is much older than I am (at least 14 years). Now I have more information to consider before proceeding to get to know him better.

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